Copyright Holly Arsenault, 2008. All rights reserved. This text may not be reproduced or performed without explicit, written consent of the author.

Please direct inquiries to hollypla@gmail.com.

Undo premiered at Live Girls! Theater in Seattle, Washington, May 2008


MAN.            
That camera laid there in the grass for a long time.  I do direct mail services.  This is a legitimate business.  A lot of times you see those ads to stuff envelopes from home and make money, which is a scam.  It’s a scam to scam housewives out of their money.  Do you know what you get if you send your money to one of those places?  You get instructions on how to place an ad to convince other housewives to send you money.  This seems particularly nefarious to me, because you are pitting housewives against housewives.  Anyway, what I do is direct mail services, which is where you do the mailing for someone else’s business so that they don’t have to worry about mailing.  But mostly, yes, mostly what I do is stuff envelopes.  I stuffed one hundred envelopes and then went back to the window. (He puts two fingers to his carotid artery again and breathes out slowly.  This is reflexive.)  It was still there.  I stuffed two hundred more envelopes, it was still there.  I ate two burritos (they’re small).  It was still there. 

 (The developer walks up and stands holding a box of cereal as if it’s on the shelf.  The woman takes the cereal from the developer’s hand and holds it.  The developer goes back to her station.) 

MAN.             
Are you getting cereal?

WOMAN.     
Yeah.

MAN.            
Just for you, or to bring to the party?

WOMAN.     
For the party. 

MAN.                        
Really? (She poses briefly with the cereal.  He takes her picture. [12])

WOMAN.     
Yeah. 

MAN.            
Is that a thing that you and your friends do?

WOMAN.     
Is what?

MAN.                        
Cereal for brunch.

WOMAN.     
I don’t understand what you’re asking.

MAN.            
Your friends invited us over for brunch, right? (He takes her picture [11].)

WOMAN.     
Yes.

MAN.            
And they asked you bring something.

WOMAN.     
Right.

MAN.            
And what you’re bringing is cereal?

WOMAN.     
Uh huh.

MAN.            
Well, shouldn’t you…

WOMAN.     
What?

MAN.            
Shouldn’t you bring something…else?

WOMAN.    
What’s wrong with cereal?

MAN.            
Well…

WOMAN.     
People like cereal.

MAN.            
Yes.  People do.  But at brunch I think you usually.  I mean, I don’t know.  Don’t people normally bring something…cooked?

WOMAN.     
Oh, I see.  You think my cereal doesn’t represent enough labor. Maybe oatmeal(she wanders off to another part of the store.  As she goes, he takes her picture [10])

MAN.            
It takes 15 steps to go from my front door to the top of the stairs.  There are 21 stairs.  It takes 43 steps to get to the grassy median, but you can cross the parking lot diagonally, which takes 32 to 39 steps, depending on if there are cars parked. And there would be some time waiting at the corner for the walk sign.  Maybe 2 and half minutes.  You might be able to cross the street, get the camera, and cross back on one signal.  Maybe you could.